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The Edge of Silence

The kitsune lay in one of the few private places she'd found on the ship--atop a couple of crates stacked high and lashed to the deck. She turned her face up towards the flawless blue sky, enjoying the pressure of the sun on her skin. Today had been a good one, so far. She'd made the acquaintance of Ito, who was turning out to be amusing company, and they hadn't been attacked by anyone or anything, which was really all Reiko asked out of any day, any more. She heard Zhane muttering next to her, and turned her head to see the gaijin spirit imitating her, lying flat on her back on the crates, looking up into the sky.

Reiko laughed, and said in the badly accented English she was learning how to speak, "Slee-ping?"

The spirit rolled towards her, landing almost nose to nose with the kitsune, and put her hands under her head in an imitation of a sleeping child, giggling. In this mood, it was easy to understand why she'd loved the gaijin, even though after death she was fragmented and strange.

Setto sat on his heels near her head, keeping watch. He looked down at her and said, "That fox has something up his sleeve. He stank of it, Rei. Be careful with him."

She shrugged as best she could while lying flat on her back. "I will. I couldn't leave him behind, though. Without training, he's a menace to society. With training, he'll still be a menace, but then it'll be his choice to be so."

"Too soft-hearted these days, Rei." His voice was teasing. "What happened to my black-hearted vixen, the terror of the Court? Is she reduced to teaching little boys how to use their equipment?"

She didn't rise to the bait. "I have to say, he didn't look so very little, husband," she said lazily. "Not little at all, really. I suppose I'll find out for myself tonight, though."

He laughed at her. Reiko raised her head and asked, "Tsuyoshi, what are you doing?"

The spirit was crouched at her side, running translucent fingers through the skin over her heart. "Looking. Thinking. The usual."

"Odd boy. Adorable, but odd." She turned her attention back to Setto. "So I'm thinking that I ought to find us a wu jen like the kind that brought Lin back to life. I'd really like the Demonbane to stop killing us, and bringing you back seems to be the only way. Well, either that or wait till all of us die."

He smiled down at her. "Are you sure? There are no guarantees. We don't know how things will go, afterwards."

"I'm willing to risk it. Even the pain of losing you once more, even knowing that you're mortal and will age and die...I think it's a small price to pay for the chance of kitsune still living in the world. Besides, we can cross that bridge when we come to it, right?"

"We always have. I have to admit, it would be good to be among the living again. Tell my father where he can put his crusade against your people. Finish the job I started five centuries ago." He brushed a hand down the side of her face. "My grandson, should he live, will be emperor, and the fortune of our line will finally be secure."

"Why not you? I rather fancy the title of Empress."

"Too many centuries, I'm afraid. Akechi would be better than I for the position."

Tsuyoshi's voice was quiet and worried. "Reiko?"

She lifted her head again, looking at the spirit of her wu jen. "What?"

"That thing you're talking about, with bringing Setto back into life? There's a problem with that."

"Tell me."

"Look, here, with magical Sight on. See, the sigil that's on his heart has its match over yours. If he comes back to life, that sigil will break. And..." He fell silent, obviously not wanting to say whatever it was he'd seen.

Reiko sighed, irritably. Tsuyoshi ran his hand through his hair, and continued. "That sigil's been on you so long that it's become integral to keeping your body and soul together. If you break it...Reiko, you'll die. I can't see any way around it. Bringing Setto back into life will mean your death. And the rest of us will also go into the final darkness. The only one left will be your husband."

She sat up, shocked to the bone. Despite the sunlight, she was cold, so cold. She wanted to accuse Tsuyoshi of lying, but it wasn't in his nature. What he told her must be the truth. The look on Setto' face mirrored her own--shocked and grieving. They had thought, for a little space, that they might be able to be together once again. But if she would flicker out the moment he came back to life...

Se pulled her knees to her chest and hid her face in her hair. Her shoulders shook, and the samurai spirit realized that his wife was crying. He knelt next to her, putting an insubstantial arm around her. "Rei, I'm sorry. I truly am. Sssh, love."

She lifted her tear-stained face. "And to think, that for a little while there, I was so stupid as to hope. Hope that one day I'd be able to be with you again. Hope that I would become again what I was, what I'm meant to be. Instead, I have a choice. Die under Thrykeen swords once the Demonbane gets tired of honoring our agreement. Or die bringing you back to life, to try to get him to stop killing my kind."

"The latter has honor."

She snarled, "I am kitsune. The human concept of honor holds no water with me! But..."

"But you've grown too much like us to reject the thought of an honorable death." Setto knew he was walking a very fine line with his vixen. He knew she truly wanted her kind to continue, but he also knew that, as an immortal, the thought of death was terrifying to her. To tell a creature that had thought it would go on forever that it might choose to stop was a hard thing, a hard thing indeed.

"Damned samurai. I knew hanging around you people was a mistake. But it's death no matter which way I turn. Die in hiding, hunted down by the Demonbane's creatures, or die where it might actually do some good." The tears began to fall from her eyes again, and she rested her chin on her knees and let them fall, not bothering to wipe them away. "I hate this. I hate the Demonbane for forcing this decision on me. I hate Lin for creating the sigils. And i hate the idea that you will finally be walking the world again and I will be dust."

He said nothing, just held her as best he could. Not for the first time, he wished for his body back, so he could comfort her properly, hold her while she cried. Then he shivered as he remembered--no matter what, he was never going to hold her again. He'd been used to things as they were, adjusted to being a spirit, invisible except to the vixen. Though she often frustrated him, life without her was utterly unimaginable. But he smothered his fears; she didn't need his worries in addition to her own. He murmured, "You don't have to decide now. Demonbane's agreement still holds. You have time yet."

"Time to contemplate my own death sentence. Time to decide which of two ways to die is better. Time to think about the fact that being an immortal doesn't always mean you live forever. Dear kami." She rubbed her eyes, looking for a moment like the child she had been over seven centuries ago. "I--I'm afraid. Were you, when you knew?"

He smiled wryly. "More than you know, Rei. It took all of my courage to ask you to be my sword, and to go through with it. But my death served another purpose, something larger than myself. As yours might. It was...a comfort. But just because we look forward to an honorable death, it doesn't mean that we welcome it when it arrives."

"Kitsune aren't supposed to end! We were once feared, revered. Now we're just hunted. In the long run...will it make any difference? If it isn't the Demonbane, will it be someone else? I could run, if I wanted. Leave Japan. Live in exile, somewhere he couldn't find me."

"You could." He covered her pale hand with his translucent one. "It would be a very lonely existence, knowing that you were the only one of your kind left in the world. But it would be the only way to avoid this, and you would live. It's your choice."

"Damned samurai. You've infected me with your sense of duty, Setto. I can't leave, and you know it. I'm too tightly bound to our family. I am well and truly stuck." Her expression was bleak as she looked out over the ocean.

"Are you going to tell the others?"

"No, I won't tell them, not yet at least. They don't need to know, the Lady doesn't need any more things weighing on her mind." Setto disagreed; he thought those she had recently come to care for would appreciate knowing of the kitsune's dilemma. He didn't argue with her, though. Not in the mood she was in; he'd try to change her mind later.

Eyes still fixed on the horizon, Reiko spoke once more in a voice that held a deep grief. "Will you promise me one thing?"

"Anything, Rei."

"Scatter my ashes on the estate in Kyoto. Let the earth remember me and none else."

There was nothing he could say to that, other than, "I will."

And for a long time, they were silent, the kitsune and her spirits, slow tears trickling down her face.

Below her, out of sight, Hiroshi detached himself from the shadow of the crates the kitsune was sitting on. With a glance upwards, he slipped away, silently.